In case you forgot...

...I only go to shows for scene points and to look cool. Don't get the story twisted and think I actually care about your band or supporting this scene.

I love people and feel sorry for anyone who truly believes that. Don't worry about why I'm here or what I do, if it concerns you then you shall know. There are bigger things than some girl enjoying herself night after night to lose sleep over, I'm just saying!

Always up or down, never down and out

No matter what I'll find a reason to wake up in the morning and keep smiling. It's what I do, I push through in hopes of better tomorrows. In hopes of not sounding ungrateful or selfish, I could really use a change of pace.
I truly wish I knew the lesson to be learned and the reason for all the trials and tribulations, I'd love to do better and be better if I only knew.

Love you babygirl

=D
Wow, I'm on top of the world. Feels like my guardian angels decided to reward me with one amazing time. Golly, I honestly forgot what pure joy felt like til right now. Normally I'd say long overdue but I think it was right on time, need to experience some shit lows to appreciate that great high. A super super high if you will.

Damn there's a smile on my face and a spark in my eye and a pain in my side. Must be happiness.

Seriously???

What the fuck did I ever do to you? Saw an amazing movie that brought a smile to my face with two of the best people someone could have in their life. To only be brought down, not gently but sucker punched in the gut and then curbed.
Someone for whatever reason decided to break my windshield wiper off my car. Yeah, really. Karma is a bitch and I know first hand cause of the fucked up things that have been happening in my life, so I know that fate is gonna catch up to all one day. Hopefully theirs is coming quicker than ours.

I really wish I had money to throw around cause this fucking sucks. Another $120 I don't have, plus labor...

If you come over, then together, willing we'll take over the world

Sing it Loud - No One Can Touch Us

love

An when I kiss you on the lips
You know that I mean it
An when I get your name tattooed to my neck
You better never forget
So dance with me, and never let me go
And I will always let you know
Girl, be always loving me
And I'll always be your G

Have you ever thought

what if? Not in the typical sense, but in the dream sense. If that even makes any bit of sense. Basically I've found myself wondering, had circumstances been different would things be any different. I find myself thinking no, even though it should be yes. Maybe I'm too much of a realist for my own good.

I like you better
In any weather
When you're not trying
It's so inviting
I don't deserve you
I can't afford you
Unless you're timeless

Could've...

...damn, damn, damn.

A conversation via text messages

Me: We need to hang soon, warped tour stick together let good things happen will be in full effect. We saw what happened when I'm not with you.
Mandy: haha yeahhhhh about that. warped lets stick together fullllll effect allll the way
Me: You know I'm down, lol. I gotta make out with somethin
Mandy:haha something? you mean someone lol haha
Me: hahahaha beggers can't be choosers. ;)
Mandy: lol I love you
Me: and I you

you think you know, but you have no idea

I heart my friends

Let's party

While many people are focused on their vacations, you are driven now to get your life and your career back in order. The Sun is in your 10th House of Public Responsibility, and it may be time to live up to your obligations -- to yourself and to loved ones. Instead of concentrating all your efforts today on getting ahead, leave some time to do something crazy, like having fun.

The stars want me to get crazy, I'm down...

I'm just a nobody who cares

Fall tours are slowly being announced and already they are ruining my brain. Do I go to Recher or The National? And if I go to The National do I just go back to Richmond the next day or should I just skip Richmond altogether and not even go to that EPIC tour? Better question who in their right mind would not go to the close ridic show to ride with me to the mediocre one? Well they would consider it meh while I'm peeing my pants trying to be in two places at once.
If this is any indication on how things are going to be, I'm hoping someone I love plays Vegas on my birthday and not Baltimore. I'll tell you right now, if need be I will drive hours for The Academy Is... tour. FTSK & Cobra not so much. Ahhhhhhh! What to do what to do?

By the by, I absolutely love UTIOG

I know already

I get dealt a bum hand quite frequently, occasionally I fold but normally I play it out and hope for the best. I don't really need constant reminders from the peanut gallery of how bad things are. I have no choice but to live my life and I like to highlight the positives and mask over the other shit. You saying, "wow I don't know how you do it, I wouldn't be able to..." or "man that sucks, you're always the one that gets screwed" doesn't help matters nor do I feel better. It just brings me back to reality and makes it a little harder to wake up it the morning. That is if I slept to begin with.

Exactly one month later

Hmm so either I'm really bad at asking questions, or homeboy is bad at answering them.

June:
Hey I should have your number for the next time you're in town and want to hang out.
Yadda Yadda yadda... I'm like super super single now.

July:
How have you been?
You look so sexy.

At least I know what "you look so sexy" means, however I don't know what one should say to that when caught completely off guard. I'll just say maybe dreams really do come true. We'll see.


ps: I refuse to be a resident of CB Nation or Lametown, USA. Thanx buddy!

Shady bitches

I'm at work, my bosses are in St. Louis. They left Monday night. Oh wait, our company week long vacation to St. Louis was canceled.

Yup!

Smiling

Just read this blog and it made me appreciate life's idiosyncrasies.
"I just called my neighbor and asked to borrow peanut butter. We met in the hallway. He had peanut butter. I had a knife and bread. I spreaded the peanut butter I needed onto the bread. He insisted I take more. I did. Then we made a few jokes about how crazy it was that we were actually doing that. Then I said “I’m gonna go blog that this happened.” The End."

By the by, yesterday was a good time even though I didn't watch my favorite band ever...

To-do list

These things help ease my mind. People wonder how I stay so calm cool and collective no matter what. Organizing lists would probably be at the top of the list. That and my traditional "don't care" attitude.

• Pack
• Work-Out
• Go to Movies
• Finish Hair
• Eat
• Find Clothes
• Prep Business Cards
• Figure out Cleveland
• Finish to-do list
  

I refuse to have a bad week

Yesterday sucked it was bad on top of suck smooshed down with oh damn. That will not be the case for any other day this week so all the effed up things need to go on vacay and come back Sunday. kthanksbye

On a lighter note, TAI's single comes out today so I'm going to pee my pants a little more and buy it when I get home, so I can cry myself to sleep. Shut up, cause you don't know!

Warped tour is literally tomorrow, I have no idea or plans but I'll tell you this, if anyone asks me to come tomorrow, I'm doing it. End of story, so when I'm in Philly and Dude says you coming tomorrow? And I say uh probably not, and they say you should come, Imma say you should make room. I'm a little over doing the responsible thing and ready to get wreckless. That sounds horrible, hopefully I don't end up saying "it was a good idea at the time", but in all honesty I know I will.

Oh and there are all sorts of randoms lurking me as of late weather its via myspace, twitter, this blog, or my portfolio. Pretty sketchtastic, but this is what it means to be an inhabitant of the twenty-first century. Sidenote, all those links have my name in them, am I becoming vain? Hmm...

WHERE IS VEGAS?!?!?!?!?!?!?!??!?!

Reason #2 to smile

Can't get you out of my system

How do you move on and forget when you're constantly reminded? And it's not like "aww it's blue, that was our color" no it's I see your picture everywhere I turn or hear your voice or someone else is talking about you. It is exact 100% references to the very thing I wish wasn't the focus of my thoughts. Even when I turn everything off and hide myself away, you find a way to reach me. Don't know how much more I can take but at least I'll get some closure soon.

This is why I wake up at 646am

Do yourself a favor and click this link.

Animator vs. Animation

Why?

Why are people assholes? No seriously...
Fuck motherfuckers who can't park and fuck bitches that don't leave notes. I just hope that one day they will see the wrongness of their ways. I also hope that karma returns the favor, maybe not in anything extreme just enough for them to feel shitty for a minute.

While I'm ranting, why is it that people can't be sensible and logical? I understand not everyone thinks the same and that's the beauty of being a human, but seriously how hard is it to shut up your mouth not jump to conclusions or blow things out of proportion enough to come to an amicable decision. Do cats not realize that hysterics waste time and energy and make you someone no one wants to deal with? I'm just glad that after countless hours things are finally getting accomplished.

Lastly, I'm starting to think that deep down I'm not a good person. Just because it seems no matter how far I bend over backwards or how polite I am, things never go my way. And its not like a selfish, bratty I never get what I want. It's a out of 10 options whichever one fucks over monique the most, is the one that plays out. Now I'm a strong believer that what goes around comes around, and good things happen to good people and to those who wait. And nothing is owed to you, you have to go out there and get it for yourself and all that other rah rah sis boom bah shit. But damn, who did I fuck over royally in my past? Cause I can't catch a break. Nevertheless, I roll with the punches and do the best I can to make things the most positive. Just wish fate made things a little easier every once in a while. No matter the case, I'll never stop being me or stop doing what I feel is the selfless right thing to do, and hopefully people won't take too much advantage of it.

My horoscope for today didn't help things. "Be careful about building your plans on unpredictable feelings, for if your emotions change, so can the foundation of your grand adventure. Still, putting together a play book is a smart idea now as long as you don't focus on what you want. Instead be willing to try something very different as you look to see how to do what's best for all." My feelings are already unpredictable and this is going to be an extremely emotional and unpredictable week. Great timing stars. Good thing I'm good on my feet cause it looks like curveballs are ahead.

It's ok because this will always make me smile, til the day it makes me cry...

• About A Girl
• Summer Hair = Forever Young
• His Girl Friday
• The Test
• Rumored Nights
• Automatic Eyes
• Crowded Room
• Coppertone
• After The Last Midtown Show
• Beware! Cougar!
• Paper Chase
• One More Weekend…

oh and fuck overdraft fees!

If I wore my bathing suit top to warped tour...

would you still be my friend? Haha it's so freakin hot outside lately, I dunno if I can bare my usual 2-3 layers. As my mom would say "it's 90 better wear 2 tank tops." Maybe I'll go balls to the wall and rock the swim halter and jeans. At least when I get hosed down with water balloons, I'll dry well the top of me.
I do have a legit outfit in store that's so hot if I find the right shoes, of course. I don't have time for this. Ahhh!!! Maybe I'll just be a complete ass and wear this:


Sidenote: I really want this shirt

Sorry bout ya

So according to my horoscope, copied below of course, I should get out the dreambook and analyze my dream. I'll probably figure something about about some people that is going to freak me out more than I already am. With that info I'll share it with a friend or two. One or all of which will hate on me for one reason or another. Knowing this info will result in tension with my friend(s), I would want to keep it to myself but since I'm going to be spazzing out it's not going to work. So I'm just gonna tell them and let the cards play as they lie. INTENSE!

Your willingness to delve into the mysteries of your own psyche can lead you to buried treasure today. But it's not so simple when what you bring into awareness creates tension with your peers. Keeping the intensity to yourself is not a viable solution. Facing the resistance from others takes courage yet will lead to positive transformation.

Here's a pet peeve of mine

If I ask you a question that you should know the answer to because its your opinion, idea, information to know. Don't say yeah ask so-and-so. I could understand if its a story you don't want to relive or your super busy and just told it to someone else. But not when it's do you want white or blue.

FUCKIN SHIT!

My dreams are so effed

I had at least 3 warped tour related nightmares. Awesome!
Then on my first attempt to go to bed I had a very strange dream. I picked up Zack and Christine from the mall and were taking them places. For some reason got angry said I needed a drink and pulled up to Applebee's. But there was a ridic line and Applebee's was more like a bar than a restaurant. Not only that but we met this super nice old couple while waiting in line and the line was in an AC Moore or Frank's or something like that. So we were grabbing random shit and playing with it. My dream just kinda ended, never got that drink nor bought anything from Frank's.
My second attempt I went to Arundle Mills for a FTSK show. Hung out with the band for a bit, watched their set from the balcony (Arundle Mills is 1 floor in case you don't know). I ended up running into Ebony who I guess I had cancelled plans with earlier cause she said something like "you could've just said you were coming here instead". I thought I went to the show by myself but at the end of the night Christine was there and asked something about when we were leaving cause her and someone wanted to get food first. I think the someone was Alexa might have been Stephani, maybe both. Umm I ended up sitting in some small quiet room talking for like an hour with one of the members (you can ask for details in person not sharing them here). A while later I was in the parking lot looking at stars and sending a few text messages while waiting for Christine and company to return, guess they went out to dinner. While waiting a van flashed their lights at me; it was FTSK but I was confused cause I had just saw them all get on the bus for the night. Apparently they bring a van with them places to go out, I got pulled into the van and my dream ended with me saying "I've been kidnapped" as the van drove past my returning friends.
The last dream I had before finally waking up for good was quite quick, or maybe I just can't remember it all. Either way, I went to the movies with Mandy and Ebony. Don't know what we went to see but it was a comedy and I was amped to see it. Turned the corner and almost dropped my popcorn because someone I knew (don't think I ever saw who it was) was in there with their friends and said "what the fuck are you doing here?" and I said "this is my hometown not yours...". Mandy said "wow what are the odds" and then started explaining to Ebony the situation but I wasn't close enough to hear and she was speaking softly so the other party didn't know what she was talking about.

yeah...this is what goes on in my head when I have no legit control.

According to Facebook...

You are a CLOSET FREAK!

You let out your freak occasionally, but you have so much left to accomplish! There is something deeply naughty about the way you approach sex, you just need to find someone to unleash your inner beast. Find them and find yourself!

Say no to white

Blackle

Use less light on your computer monitors, saving energy and money and the world!

How bad do I suck?

I was just asked "do you have time for me to have a life crisis or are you super busy with your site? cause i mean i can hold it"

Do I really come off as a self-involved workaholic? Cause that's and issue. Let me just remind all of you, I would put my dreams on hold for my friends. I'm never too busy or too tired or too sick for one of you.

edit: undo

GOD BLESS THE EDIT BUTTON! I TEND TO OVERREACT WHEN MY FRIENDS ARE INVOLVED. I WASN’T THERE AND ALL I HAVE TO GO ON IS THE ACCOUNT OF ONE OF MY BEST FRIENDS AND ALL I EVER WANT TO DO IS SUPPORT THEM. THERE IS NO FURTHER NEED FOR ME TO BLOW THIS OUT OF PROPORTION. I HATE HEARING PEOPLE CALLED THAT WORD. IT MAKES ME CRINGE. THATS ALL. KIND OF LIKE AT THE END OF THE CHAPELLE SHOW WHEN PEOPLE WERE LAUGHING AT THE RACIST JOKES RATHER THAN AT THE SATIRE OF THEM.

I'm buying a new computer

I've been craving a new PC for some time, but didn't see a need for one. Nor had anything caught my eye until this HP came out. I'll probably get it for my birthday or Christmas as a gift to myself then get pissed when February rolls around and there's a better one out. I'll more than likely store my current Gateway in a closet for when I move out. I don't know who needs to own 3 computers, but sounds like a good idea to me. If I keep saving up and my car keeps doing fine, I'll be able to buy it in cash!! Yay for that :)

If someone buys my computer before me, I'll cut them. j/k
Not really...

Blah la la la

Losing my sight, losing my mind wish somebody tell me I'm fine...

What's going on Internet people? Yet another day of little sleep and a lot of work. Good news my website is 98% done only have to add three more pieces when I get home (those files were still at work). Which means all those sick ideas I've been coming up with for 2 months can start becoming tangible things. Well virtually tangible...if that's even possible.
Hmm what else is there? I keep thinking about this guy and the likelihood of anything coming out of it and that in turn makes me think about the likelihood of me with anyone. In all honesty I don't even think my body physically cares anymore, usually when you're near someone you find attractive your body reacts, mine hasn't in two months. I'm not really alarmed since I've lost motivation, maybe warped tour will change things.
Speaking of warped tour, that's next fucking week. Oh my damn. I've successfully found a way into 2 of the 3 dates I'm attending. The 3rd will more than likely get solidified at the first two. I've also found a ride to Cleveland and home from Cleveland also to Maryland. Just need to get a ride from Maryland to my Cleveland ride. I'm also looking for upgrades in all three so if you're reading this and attending let a girl know. If you wanted to attend MD but don't have the cash, let me know cause we may be able to barter a ticket for ride.
I still can't believe I'm going to Ohio, or Nevada for that matter. Maybe next year I'll make it to Canada, California and Illinois. Maybe I'll go to Pittsburgh next week too. August is around the corner so I gotta get all my fun in now.

Oh to add to my wishlist, in case you guys want to be smart and use my blog to figure out what to buy me for a birthday gift, I want a bunch of CDs that list is coming eventually. I also need a yellow american apparel hoodie and casual black shoes. I also decided that I'm going to get the HTC Touch Pro phone.
article 1 | article 2

Well I guess ignorance is bliss...

Rolling Stone Article

"you know what? you call my friend a “n_gger”, i dont even give a fuck what happens to you. i dont want to see you in this scene. i dont want to see you at shows. you are who we write songs about. you are who we think about when we hate. radiohead, karma police over and over again in my head.

what a joke.

you are fucking pathetic and anyone that disagrees should put their white hood on too. i dont want your ticket money. i dont want your cd sales. id rather be poor and unknown.

i am angrier than i have been in a long time. hate upon hate upon hate.

thank god for my friends."
~Pete Wentz

"Damn right you bash their heads in. I have no tolerence for things like that whatsoever, it's just plan rude and ignorant. If your gunna beat someone up, might as well be for a good reason *cough cough* certain former frontman of another band starting with E T F *cough cough*I'm just saying."
~Perez Hilton

A new way of looking

Snail?

Opportunity?

For the record

There are still ants on my desk and I'm tired of killing them cause it makes me feel bad, I'm also tired of them crawling on me...

And I still have no idea what "super super single" means, but I'm going to say that I am too!

I'm in a glass case of emotion.

I feel like I just got rushed to the hospital and any minute I'm going to go into labor. Scary but joyous at the same time. Last night around 3am, I softly launched my website, moniquedidit.com. Now if you've seen Ocean's 13 you may remember the soft open, if you haven't let me explain. A soft open much like my soft launch is when a small amount of people are allowed to experience the casino or website and give you feedback. You work out all the kinks and get everything perfect before the grand opening. We all know what a grand opening is so I don't have to explain that. Anywho, if you go to the site, hit me up and let me know what you dig and what sucks. No need to be gentle just give it to me.
On a similar note, my horoscope pretty much told me not to get shit done today and enjoy myself. I think that's suiting since I just handled shit last night and Alexia is coming over today to spend time with me. "Your giddy optimism turns more cautious today as the reality of what you want to accomplish finally begins to sink in. You could begin to stress so much about the completion of a project or a phase of your life that your goals slip farther away into the future. Relax and enjoy yourself for a while; you'll return to your work refreshed and raring to go."

I got soooo much on my mind, but I need to get back to my job, more than likely I'll make another post in an hour or so and i don't think any of you check that often so this is practically pointless except for my own well being, which is kinda important...

Shit is poppin off

moniquedidit.com

So freaky

http://www.sliceoflifetv.com/index.php?id=505dab9e
Haha thanks Mary Anne

Answer: The Matches

Did you hear that New York Governor Eliot Spitzer dropped more than $80,000 on a high-class prostitute and had to resign? And did you know that everybody in America wanted to see a picture of this prostitute because they were curious about what kind of woman can charge thousands for sex? And that yesterday somebody discovered that this prostitute a MySpace page? Did you know that everybody went to visit this page yesterday? How many people do you think went there? Would you believe 1.8 million people? And did you know that she is a singer, and that this page was was a MySpace music page?
So here's my question: Who was the featured band on MySpace Music yesterday, the band whose smiling mugs greeted 1.8 million who visited the site?

Answer: (See Title)


Stole this from Shawn's Blog, too good not to repost. This is from March not yesterday.

My horoscope is against me

Planning social events in advance enables you to get out and have more fun. But don't be surprised if you decide that you want to bail at the last minute. Of course your responsibilities come first, yet downtime with friends can actually make you more productive when you finally get back to work.

No way stars, I'm getting my stuff done TODAY!

so maybe today won't be so bad

Things that put a smile on my face:

Wentz: ps if you ever get a chance to try music id on a blackberry (or whatever phone has it), its pretty insane. you hold your phone up to a speaker and it tells you what song is playing. its like harry potter and steve jobs all mixed up into one.
I honestly think we'd be great friends if we ever met and it was in a social setting.

And this video. In case you don't know the starring characters it includes my favorite band and one of their BFFs who happens to be my idol. Well not really idol but yeah...

Go nuts, go apeshit