Last night I learned how to put on a belt...

Who knew a simple question could lead to an hour long discussion? I mean I guess I knew, but not with the one I asked last night. "What would your belt look like with brown on top?" Yeah something as simple as that ended with an epiphany, awkward feelings, questionable sexuality and battle lines drawn in the sand.
I did learn not only that I wear my belt wrong but that I think far differently than anyone else. That gave me hope for a successful life. My whole job is to be creative, imaginative, unique and different. When I start going with the grain, I no longer get a paycheck. No pressure...
This week I'll be doing a lot of reflecting and analyzing myself as I create an identity package. Fortunately I have a name, I think. Need to bounce it around and see if I really like it. Easier said than done, because I hate committing myself to things. I'll get over it enough to get things done. No worries.
I can feel my life spiraling out of control and it excites me. As excited I am, I'm more scared, but I'm turning that fear into the catalyst to jump start myself. Things are going so fast and it's hard for me to even grab hold of anything enough for it to make an impression on my life. That's scary. But at night when I'm restlessly thinking of what needs to get done and where it will put me when it is complete, I recall everything done and said throughout the day. So in reality life isn't slipping away, I just don't have time to think in the mist of it anymore. We'll see how that affects things.
For right now, the blinders are up and the gun has been fired. I'm running my own race and not veering off for anyone. I can't afford to put Monique on hold anymore and anyone who doesn't support this decision isn't someone that should be in my life to begin with. I just hope all this is worth it because the things I have planned are dependent on others and that's something I can't calculate in the planning stages.

Just stay positive and keep good energy around and I can do anything.